On being set up.

S: Your boyfriend’s friend is gonna be way too hot for me. Your boyfriend is too hot for me.

C: My boyfriend’s too hot for me. Shit.  I don’t want people to think that.

S: They don’t think that. YOU’RE too hot for me.

C: Bullshit! We’re the same level of cuteness except for maybe you’re cuter! Let me get pics of this guy.

S: I am not cuter. Cute boy at the pool kept ogling you and he never even looked at me.

C: You are soo much cuter than you are giving yourself credit for. When I first saw you I thought you were so pretty! Anddd had a good sense of style, and then I understood why you were married and able to have a married boyfriend.

S: As if it’s an achievement.

C: Wait, do you find Vince Vaughn at all attractive?

S: No, I don’t.

C: Okay…crap!

S: Is he overweight? And has a perpetual 5 o’clock shadow? With jowls?


S: ‘Cause that’s what I think of when I think of Vince Vaughn.


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